I get it now.


In all honesty, I didn’t know what to call this blog post, but this sentence sums up my whole trip to Tanzania.

So it’s almost a week since arriving back in England and I’m sat in bed with suspected Malaria and a whole lot of ‘return-to-reality’ blues. I never expected Africa to have such an impact on me but I guess that’s what happens when you take a fairly sheltered westernised girl to somewhere WAY out of her comfort zone.

Not going to lie, when Hope said ‘come to Tanzania’… I agreed. But it wasn’t a fully committed yes. If you know me, you know I have some sort of phobia to commitment (in certain situations that is… give me a cake and I will commit to eating it, no problem). But all jokes aside, I didn’t really believe I was going until the day I was sat on the plane, listening to Ethiopian Airlines telling me where the nearest exits were and their annoying background music.

My problem with going was simple, I like to be in control (shock) and I like to know where I’m going. In this case, I was not in control because I had no idea where I was going, what to expect, or a set agenda.

I had no idea that I would love it as much as I did.

Here’s the thing… I went over there thinking I was going to help Hope and her charity (www.hopeandsoul.org.uk) and I was going to change and fix peoples lives. HAHA think again sister, YOU are not that special! I soon came to realise that I was the one that needed changing and fixing and that my whole mentality towards life was very wrong.

This is very personal, but here are some lessons I learned…

  1. I am very selfish and I care too much about the wrong thing… myself, and what people think about me. This is a very western problem due to the media etc, but this is something I vow to get shot of. I want to be pouring into people’s lives and loving/ building people up rather than focusing on my gains. Sometimes, the littlest thing we do for someone occupies the biggest part of their heart.
  2. Life is always looking at what comes next – for me it was what my next move would be to level up in my career, how much I can save for a house etc. Don’t get me wrong, these things are great to plan, BUT I will never get the same moment twice. While I’m focusing on my future, I’m ignoring the present. I want to be more present and live in the moment. The people I have in my life are precious and time goes so quickly.
  3. The thing that got me the most was that you don’t have to move mountains to show people you love them. Heck, before this trip I struggled with this so much and thought I had to do everything in the world to show people I cared. No. Time is the key ingredient. Just being available, and giving up 5mins to talk can make a huge impact.

This is just a general overview of the main things I got from this trip, but I will write a more detailed post about what we actually got up to when I feel a bit better!

For now, all I can say is this trip has made a huge impact on me in ways I never thought it would. I feel like I have come back a better person, even though I still have things to work on, but my perspective on life has flipped.


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